Late in the day, here is another randomly generated question…
What do you give your best effort on?
I strive to be a good daugther, and to do my best at meeting my mom’s expectations of me. Regrettably, all too often it feels as if I am a disappointment to her.
Lesson learned: self assessments are not to be trusted [in my case].
Oh my word. Just the other evening I thougth to myself, that I really made some headway with regard to being more flexible throughout any given day. I was under the impression, that unforseen situations no longer cause as much havoc, and disrupt my entire day as much as they still did, let’s say two years ago. That’s what I thought. But the proof is in the pudding, as we know. And what do you think? I was proven wrong yet again.
The cause for this morning’s changed routine is not relevant now. But it ended up affecting the entire day, my mood, my productivity, in short everything. I was so disappointed in myself for not having made any progress at all. I do try, but apparently not enough. So, while this is a discouraging setback, giving up is not an option. No matter what, I have to persevere. Even if it won’t get better going forward either, perhaps I can be proud of myself for sticking with it.
Up in the attic are still toys and books from childhood, that I stubbornly refuse to let go of. Other treasures from the 70’s, my heart is not quite so attached to, were taken to the local thrift store to be donated. That was our goal this morning, and then…
The employees were overly picky and disrespectful, saying things like “that book is old, no one wants to read that” and “the box is not in perfect condition, we won’t accept that” or “those toys have little blemishes, we have no use for them”. I had my “verbal guns” at the ready, when one of those men said to his co-worker “gosh, the kind of crap these people bring us, do they think we take everything”? [I know that I have an anger problem sometimes. Justified or not, but that disrespect and ungratefulness was really setting me off]. Lucky for them, I did not have to “aim and fire choice words” at them, because my terminator face mirrors my emotions. They could clearly see, that I was not amused by their behavior. Such a disappointing morning.
Am I wrong, thinking, that thrift stores are geared towards people, who specifically look for items you can’t buy in other shops because they have the value of being old(er) and are perhaps no longer produced? Aren’t those stores also in existence for people, living on a tight financial budget? And if so, I doubt very highly, that these people mind very much, if things have little nicks and dents, so long as they still work properly and are affordable! How do I know the latter? Let’s call it personal experience. When you have to turn every penny twice, you simply can’t afford to be that picky. Even if something isn’t exactly what you would like and the item is everything, except new and perfect, you still appreciate having found it at a much more affordable price. A small monthly budget will teach you gratitude right quick, let me tell you.
Where is this ungratefulness coming from? What is up with disrespct for toys and books our parents, and we ourselves grew up with? Why are items from decades ago not appreciated and valued for their age? You probably think that I’m overreacting, and that’s fine.
I would really like to support our local thrift store and its good cause. Unfortunately they lost my respect this morning. I won’t take precious-to-me items there to donate any longer. And I won’t shop there either in the near future. Being ungrateful for offered donations is one issue. Being disrespectful to the people, who want to do a good deed, is another. Both is equally disappointing and I refuse to support such an attitude, simple as that.
We all know the old adage, don’t we? Was silence golden in the situation I am going to write about below? Probably, because the friendship our neigbhor lady and I are beginning to form may have suffered severely otherwise. Well, decide for yourself…
As of late, we’ve been having some really toasty warm days, hot even.
The majority of people stay at home and try to keep hydrated and cool as best possible. And what did our neighbor lady do? She thought, that a bike ride through the woods would be just the ticket….wait for it…. She took her 15 year old dog along, who has health concerns, and had him running at full speed. Later on that evening, via text message, she complained to me, because her dog was so tired and had no energy left. Well gee whiz, why do you think that is?
It took every bit of home training I ever received as a child, not to hurl a few choice words at her.
What the fluff was she thinking? Oh, you know what? It’s nice and hot outside today, why don’t I go for a bike ride and have her running beside me at full speed? And when she flips me the birdie, because she’s exhausted and ready to collapse, I’ll look at her and say “But we’re in the woods, darlin’, it’s cooler here than in town, so what do you want”? Let’s see how much she likes that?! Gosh, I don’t know. Am I overreacting? I know, that sweet little guy is her dog, and it’s not my place to say anything. In hindsight, I think I should have regardless. She is a well-read, intelligent woman, that’s why this stupid action doesn’t fit into the picture at all. Otherwise she makes such a fuss over her dog, for example offering various food choices every day including cooked meals – because he is a picky eater. She buys all kinds of oils, pills, lotions and I don’t know what else to keep him healthy. And in stark contrast to this, that bike ride in the freaking heat. Luckily, her daughter’s kids are still on summer break, keeping their grandma busy and away from me. And while I begrudgingly adhere to the old adage in this instance, about silence being golden, I’m disappointed in her for doing this, and for being so unreasonable even days later.
Trivialities & Intricacies 
You must be logged in to post a comment.