…[Crickets Chirping]…

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Daily writing prompt
Share five things you’re good at.
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First off: Nope! I’m not being a drama queen because of this…
1) …?
2) …?
3) …?
4) …?
5) …?

…I come up with nothing, that I am [exceptionally] good at. This is the plain and disappointing truth. It’s funny though, because before my inner eye I see a rolodex-type-thing with images of people, who flip a lid whenever I say that. They would tell me not to always cut myself down like this, and then ‘desperately’ try to name things I’m [sort of] good at. The problem is, that what they try to give me credit for [or make me feel good about] isn’t worth mentioning. So, I have nothing to share with you today. Sorry.

    Why So Negative?

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    Daily writing prompt
    What is one thing you would change about yourself?
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    Out of several ‘issues-in-need-of-address’, more positivity in everyday life, including my outlook into the future, will take priority. Yes, I have project ‘brighter spirits’ in the works already, but there’s still quite a bit of room for improvement. So, with the saying “cheer up, it can only get better”, I will keep on truckin’… And on that note, have a perky and speedy hump day!! 😊

    Grandma Used To Say…

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    Daily writing prompt
    What’s the hardest decision you’ve ever had to make? Why?
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    …”Who knows, what it’s good for”?!

    We’ve been over this a million and a half times, or so it feels. Why not again?? 🙃😂
    Out of all the difficult decisions I made to date, I most regret leaving America, to move back to Germany. From 2017 onward this regret started to fade slowly with Donald Trump’s first presidency, because America began its negative transformation [in my humble opinion from far away, based upon the news coverage available to us].
    After my divorce in 2001, it took me 12 years, five job changes, five relocations, a lot of determination and elbow grease to create a good life for myself. When it was finally time to “enjoy the fruits of my labor”, my dad became terminally ill. Family comes first, that’s the way it is and this is the reason why I’m back in Germany. I’m not happy here to be perfectly honest. Still, I am grateful beyond measure for the remaining time with my dad. We always had a rather difficult relationship and “making peace” was important for both of us.

    I left the better-for-me life behind, to do what’s right. And in the end, this decision – perhaps not in its entirety – ended up being the right choice. With the current developments in America, who knows? Maybe I would have been deported by now and back in Germany anyway? At the very least I always know that I left America on my terms, with good intentions.

    Halfway Heart – Bluma Petersen

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    I stumbled upon this song “Halfway Heart” by Bluma Petersen a few days ago. At the minute, I’m listening to it on repeat and thought I’d share it with you as a musical snack at midnight. The singer Nadja Alsén’s voice reminds me a little bit of Jewel…

    “Halfway Heart” by Bluma Petersen | Source: YouTube

    I’m sure glad to have found this lovely, calm song. Have a good night and a relaxing Sunday!!

    Wide Open Spaces

    Published on by Claudia2 Comments
    Daily writing prompt
    Beach or mountains? Which do you prefer? Why?
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    I’ve never been a fan of the mountains and struggle to see the beauty in them. To me personally, mountain ranges are enclosures and make me feel confined, even though I’m not claustrophobic, per se. So if you want to go hiking in the mountains, by all means have at it, just please be so good and leave me at home. Thanks a million.
    Instead, I love being by the ocean, to feel the sand beneath my feet and hear the seagulls cry. The repetitive sounds that the waves produce, are comforting and relaxing. Not many things beat looking towards the horizon and taking in the vastness of the ocean. Wide open spaces….so beautiful….so freeing…. so soothing 🌊. Have a lovely Saturday!!

    Our Favorites

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    Daily writing prompt
    What are your family’s top 3 favorite meals?
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    🍽 Kohlrabi and carrots in white sauce with boiled potatoes and bratwurst
    🍽 our version of ratatouille [prepared in tomato sauce with veggies we like] and pasta or rice
    🍽 German pancakes [not quite as thin as crêpes] with apple sauce and cinnamon

    Colorful September

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    Daily writing prompt
    What’s your favorite month of the year? Why?
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    My favorite month of the year is September. The seasons are changing from summer to autumn, with more comfortable temperatures during the day and cooler nights for better sleep.
    Not to mention, that it is absolutely beautiful when the leaves begin to change colors. I take in the beauty around me very consciously and appreciate it, before winter comes with mostly grey-ish, drab weather. Cooler days towards the end of September also ring in the season of fall/winter vegetables, and with it oven baked meals and hearty stews, yumm-tumm-tumm 😊.

    Magnificently Ignored

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    Daily writing prompt
    Do you trust your instincts?
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    Especially during my twenties and thirties I should have trusted my instincts. Instead, I did a magnificent job at ignoring them and paid my dues for doing so. Now, much older and a tiny bit smarter, I listen and place the proper value into those little warning signals from deep within. It took quite long enough, to be sure. And still, better late than not at all.

    No More Performance Mask

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    Daily writing prompt
    What’s the first impression you want to give people?
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    Gosh, it used to be of utmost importance, that others perceive me as a jovial and pleasant person, someone, they’d like to be around and spend time with. Interestingly enough, the harder I tried to give off a good first impression, the more my efforts seemed to backfire. The feedback I received was rather negative. Most often I was told, that my behavior came across as rehearsed and artificial [which it was, and remains to be due to autism]. And still, that criticism felt like a punch to the gut for all my “hard work”. From then on, I started to be more authentic. That wasn’t necessarily well received either, but I began feeling more like myself instead of a performer.
    Nowadays I can’t claim indifference about how others perceive me, but I’m not putting on the “out-in-public-performance-mask” anymore. I’ve learned throughout the years, that I’m not “everybody’s cup of tea” and that’s okay because I don’t aspire to be. No one’s arm is being twisted to like me. Trying to be true to myself is the ticket, I think. Those around me always have the option to either take me the way I am, or to steer clear. Have a lovely Sunday!!