“Riches, prestige, everything can be lost. But the happiness in your own heart can only be dimmed; it will always be there, as long as you live, to make you happy again.”
― Anne Frank
Author: Claudia
A-Z Challenge: Vacation
Do you remember me being all bonkers last year around this time, because my mom “had the audacity to force-vacation me”, on a cruise ship no less? And what do you know? It turned out to be – minor crises and challenges inclusive – an amazing experience over all. Well, we’re doing it again next month. For the last time, so it will be my top priority to make it a very special trip for my mom. This time, I am excited up to no Sunday, because I have a good idea of how it is going to be. Yay, vacation!! 🛫☀🛳
A-Z Challenge: Upbeat
A few of the topics I have addressed this month, with my own version of the A-Z Challenge, awakened some unpleasant memories. Clearly, it was my choice to write about my past, and I don’t regret having done so. It is a form of therapy, even after all this time. And let’s be honest about one thing, you are here and reading my posts because you choose to, not because I am twisting your arm. Am I wrong? Today it’s drab and cold outside, quite fitting to how I feel. The best way to tackle that negativity is with some upbeat music…
A-Z Challenge: Tidiness
“You are just too lazy to look for things!”
How many times was I told exactly that? I stopped counting, honestly. But that statement is correct. Why should I spend my time looking for things, when instead, I can return them to their designated place once I’m done using them? I do have to wonder why people always make this a topic of conversation with me. Why is it then? Are you a chaotic person, always in search for the things you need? Is it an ounce of jealousy perhaps, because I make a conscious choice, not to have this problem?
In all seriousness, however, tidiness is known to improve happiness, productivity, peace of mind and over all well being. So, if you can come up with one good reason, as to why I shouldn’t continue on with being too lazy to search for every tired boring thing, let’s have it. Good luck to you on finding one 😊
Sorry Excuse For A Man
Daily writing prompt
Write about a time when you didn’t take action but wish you had. What would you do differently?
*** Trigger Warning *** Post Topic: Rape *** Trigger Warning ***
One of my relationships was with a manipulative, controlling man, who would throw things at me and start screaming, whenever I did not “behave” according to his wishes. God help me, I hated his guts for the way he treated me. Because of that I denied him physical contact and intimacy.
Being told ‘no’ was unacceptable for him. He was going to get what he wanted, regardless. Once, I woke up in the middle of the night, while he sexually assaulted me. I pushed him off before he could finish. But he did this at least one more time. How do I know that? Because it is literally the only way how he could have gotten me pregnant. That was 21 years ago.
To this day I hate myself for not pressing charges at the time. I should have put his rotten ass in jail, or at least make sure, that he’d be registered as a sex offender for the rest of his life. In hindsight I truly wish, that I wouldn’t have been in such a state of emotional paralysis back then. And much like most other women do, I buried myself in work and tried my best to forget about everything.
A-Z Challenge: Spider
Do you know the nightmare, too, that has you waking up in the middle of the night and once you turn on the light you see a spider right above your face? Eww. Bah. No, please no!
We’ve had this just the other day, I know. Outside, I am in their environment and I have to come to terms with them being there. But, if they invade my space it’s on! Yea, buddy. That gets the party going right quick. You best beware of flying objects across the room and furniture being moved, if necessary, until the creepy crawling creature has been successfully eliminated. Even if it’s 3 o’clock in the morning, makes no difference either. I won’t stop until that beast is flat like a stamp and no longer moving in any way, shape or form. Yes, they equally have the right to exist – just not in my apartment. And if they dare me, they will pay with their lives. Okay, subject squashed and dead 😉
What Exactly?
Truth be told, everything that is beyond my influence or control makes me nervous to some extend. Does that make me a control freak? Oh gosh. Having to depend on other people or institutions, for instance, is a red flag because that gives them way more power and control over me, than I would ever willingly want to give anyone, if I had a choice. That makes no sense, I give up. If you even made it this far, have a fantastic day!! 😔🙃😊
A-Z Challenge: Rainbow
In such frightening and challenging times we need hope 🌈🕊🍀
Moonlight & Music
A demanding day, for me personally means, that I was exposed to a lot of overstimulation for too long of a period, without an opportunity to get away and calm down. After such an experience, a dark room with either just moonlight or another small source of light and my favorite songs via iPod is the best way to recharge and process this overwhelming day . 🌙🎧
Solid – Benzsoul
Thanks for stopping by. I hope your weekend will be a lovely one.
Trivialities & Intricacies 
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